Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.

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(909): View more from California

how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm

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(912): View more from Georgia

Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(937): View more from Ohio

I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.

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(660): View more from Missouri

i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high

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(876): View more from Jamaica

i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend

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(847): View more from Illinois

Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.

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