Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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