didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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