There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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