this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
