Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
