we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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