My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
