this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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