but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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