508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
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Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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