Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
