Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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