I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
as a side note pls kill me
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