3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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