I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize