You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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