The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize