Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
