i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
