My first STD was from a foam party
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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