Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
