you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
