She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.