Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
