Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Randomize