i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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