I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.