she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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