He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
It's official drugs can't kill me
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
