why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
