I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
