Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Text me some of your sweat
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
