He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I wish i was in the wii world.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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