Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
