she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
whose ass print is on the piano?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
