Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize