Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
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You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
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The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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