When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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