YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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