feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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