After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize