This is not my ceiling
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
