You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
