hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
These tits shall not be calmed
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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