is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I take back everything I said about communal showers
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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