i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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