the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
My life is pants optional.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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