You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
