dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
