Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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