hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
